Asking for Forgiveness

Any parent who's actually parented will tell you that there are those days of dealing with your children when you feel like the situation brings out the worst in you as a person. Afterwards you sit back and ask yourself, "Did I just say that to my child? Did I just react that way?" It's easy in those situations to feel shame about a poor choice. It's tempting to ignore the feeling, try to sweep it under the rug, and in the end remind yourself that you're human and that you make mistakes as a parent. Although I do feel that recognizing the areas we wrong our children are important, it is even more important to humble ourselves as parents and seek our child's forgiveness when we do wrong them.

My children have taught me that there is never a bad time to seek their forgiveness for a mistake I made as a parent. I did this the other day with Eden. She was giving me major attitude on her way to time out. I erupted inside. My irritation with her bodacious audacity had me floored. I didn't feel it at first. I just reacted. I should have stopped and waited. Usually when I do this I can think more clearly, move past the initial reaction, and make a better decision after consulting with Katie, but I didn't this time. Why? Well, my pride was hit. How dare she talk back to me, even if she was being obedient and marching her little tush to time out! I am her father and I deserve her respect! I still believe I was right in thinking that last line, but I went about reacting to it in the wrong way. Eden didn't get the best of her father that day. She got the worst because I missed an opportunity to shepherd the heart of the treasure God entrusted to me.

Times of childish disobedience are ripe with the opportunity to teach our children about vital life-principles like truth, love, kindness, and forgiveness. It is hard to do this when we're consumed with ourselves and in the process of our anger and pride, we can easily cause our children to become angry with us. As St. Paul wrote, triggering your child's wrath is not the wisest choice: "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord" (Ephesians 6:4). When I let pride derail me it switches the tracks of my spirit and then I start heading toward anger.

Eden said she forgave me and those sweet words were like a salve to my spirit! I believe going through the process God has taught me something and that the next time that a situation like that arises I won't be so quick to "pull the trigger" on my pride. As we always say to Eden, "Asking forgiveness means you'll work your hardest to not repeat your actions the next time." God help me!